Kids may say the darndest things, but parents post about them in the funniest ways.
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Every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents across social media platforms like X, Threads and Bluesky to spread the joy. Scroll down to read the latest batch.
Daughter is home from college and wants to know if we want to go do something at 9 PM. Uh, we don’t do that here.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 3, 2026
Baby has gotten good at identifying “dada” but still struggling with surrealism, cubism, even baroque.
— Forrest Cardamenis (@FCardamenis) May 29, 2026
My kids have a tape measure pulled out to 7’4” and are walking around our house seeing what it would be like if Wemby walked down our hall, sat on our couch, etc.
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— Jeff Stotts (@InStreetClothes) May 31, 2026
and for my next trick, I’ll cook another nice dinner that my kids will complain about.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) June 2, 2026
Pretty cool that my 10yo is studying the American Revolution at the same time that he’s experiencing the American Devolution
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) June 2, 2026
Is there anything worse for an introvert than a kids birthday party where you can’t leave and have to make small talk with parents you barely know
— meghan (@deloisivete) May 30, 2026
My daughter kissed me and also stood on my foot as she left the house for school.
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— Late to the party Laura (@ericamorecambe) June 2, 2026
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